Macgyver

I return home from the gym, and went to take a shower.  On my way to the master bathroom, I lock the bedroom door, and trip  over my wonderful husband's HERMAN MUNSTER work boots.  Grrrr.  I grumble to myself about the boots and kicked them aside.

I complete my shower, wrap myself in my towel, and head to my dressing room.  When I pull on the bedroom door, it does not open.  I twist and turn and wiggle, and it will not unlock.  Fantastic.

I manhandle the doorknob and call it terrible names.  Nothing.

I review my options..I could put my sweaty clothes back on and climb down the balcony.  I look out the sliding glass door, and figure I wouldn't likely break both my legs.  I remember geometry was not my strongest subject, so I vote against trying to repel down the side of the building with bedsheets.  I begin searching for a tool to dismantle the lock.  I find a flashlight on the bed stand.  Suddenly, a Macyver fever rushes over me, and I tear the clip from the flashlight and twist it into a screwdriver.  I attack the lock, and I think I actually heard it chuckle.  Okay, so the clip that easily bends does NOT work as a screwdriver.  Noted.  I  go through Rick's bathroom and find a man's manicure set.  Perfect.  I open it up and review the contents.  I first find a travel-sized corkscrew.  I pull it out of the holder, and put it aside.  I know it won't get the door open, but I also know I won't ever be unable to open a wine bottle due to not having the right instrument.   I daydream about how I will save the day at the next cocktail party when I produce the portable corkscrew from my purse.  I need to focus.

I find a manly nail file that I think will do the trick.

After hacking away at this dang lock for an hour, I realize this manly nail file will never get the job done.    I'm incredibly frustrated, and my hunger pangs are weakening my mind.  I survey the room, and my eyes fall on the HERMAN MUNSTER boots I tripped over earlier.  I notice the knife-sized pouch above the laces.  Sweet baby Moses!  I pull out what can only be described as a magic wand.  This is not only a knife, but several screwdrivers, pliers things, and I think a spatula.  I begin removing the doorknob.  Once it clangs to the ground, I switch the magic wand to pliers mode, and turn the pokey thing, and the door opens.

WAHOOOOO!!!! FREEEDDDOOOOOM!

Morals of the story:

1.  Let your kids watch Macgyver

2.  Be mindful of what you complain about - It just may be the thing that unlocks the door!